Do We Astral Travel?

When I’m speaking to people who have lost loved ones, I understand the longing they feel to see the one they lost again.  I long to see Mikey all the time; to behold him with my eyes and ears and touch his face, his hair, his hands.  But when I think of him, I can see him sitting right beside me.  Right after he died, I remember feeling worried that I would forget things about him over time.  Never happen.  When you lose someone you share unconditional love with, especially your child, you forget nothing.  You can call them up in your mind anytime you want. No, you can’t hear them with your ears, but you hear them in your mind.  You see them in your mind’s eye, and you can experience their energy from your memory of them.

But I noticed after he died, many times I would wake up in the morning and feel as if I really had just seen him.  I didn’t feel quite as sad; I didn’t feel as if it had been an eternity since I’d seen him,  as it had when I laid my head down to sleep the night before.  I felt as if I had just spent time with Mikey while I was sleeping.

Do we astral travel when we sleep at night?  Can we connect with loved ones in another realm when our conscious minds go to sleep?  I believe we can and do.  It sounds very hocus-pocus, but I am convinced our subconscious mind can travel wherever it wants to, as long as our conscious mind is not awake and telling us it’s impossible.  Remote viewers can see things that are happening a thousand miles away from them, and they’re awake while they’re observing.  So why can’t the rest of us experience the love from another spiritual being who is separated from us through death, when our logical conscious brain is at rest?

I’ve had several dreams about Mikey that felt like “visits” rather than dreams, and I believe they were visits from him that I was allowed to remember.  But I also believe I travel to visit Mikey myself quite often when I’m “asleep”, but I’m not allowed to remember those visits.  I don’t remember them, but I feel them when I wake up.  I feel as if I have just spent time with Mikey.  He doesn’t feel as if he’s another night farther away from me; separated even more, as more time passes after his death..  It feels as if I just left his place and woke up in mine.

Am I just having regular dreams about him which I don’t remember?   That’s probably the case sometimes.  But at other times, I know it’s not a dream.  I know I was just talking to him when suddenly I was jerked back into my body, awakened with a start.  I remember what we were talking about when I first wake up, and it never seems strange to be talking with him, even though in my “dream” I know he is physically dead.  My subconscious accepts the fact that I can spend time with a person who is only alive in spirit, while my conscious mind won’t allow me that luxury.

So when people who have lost children tell me they still have a hard time going to sleep at night years later, I always tell them that’s my favorite time to commune with Mikey. I fall asleep easier now than I ever did before Mikey’s death.  I look forward to seeing him at night, whether it’s just a dream or an actual visit from astral traveling with him.  I don’t know and I don’t care.  I know I wake up happy after feeling like I’ve seen my son, and that’s what keeps me going.Mikey's senior picture Sweet dreams!

Two new books are available now.

I was hard at work during the month of January, pulling together a book I have been working on for several years.  It’s a relationship book, and I’ve put a lot of blood, sweat, and tears and tears and tears into it.  And laughter.  And more tears.  And finally, peace.  Who knew I would be 50 when I finally “found myself?”  Or to phrase it better, I discovered that I was just as valuable as the next guy.  Sometimes it takes us a lifetime to realize our own worth.  Relationships help us find it; they’re actually the greatest tool God gives us to learn about ourselves.  I’m still not finished with that book, and it still may be years in the making.  But in the middle of writing a chapter about communication break-downs, I got off on a tangent about all the new age electronic forms of communication, and how aggravating it is for those of us who want to have a real, honest conversation with someone. So I pushed the relationship book aside, and spent the next week writing day and night about the passive aggressive ways that people use electronic communication.  The end result:  Facebook:  The Greatest Passive Aggressive Weapon EVER;  Reconnect with your Self-Worth and Unfriend your Fear.  Yes, I’m poking fun at all the silently cruel ways people use social media to make their points, as well as how the truly passive aggressive people have perfected the art of the blow-off with text messaging, but I’m poking fun at all of us.  We all use some of these tactics from time to time, and it’s the cowardly way out of communicating with people who care about us. Cell phones are a blessing and a curse for communicating with people….who really don’t communicate.

Hopefully you’ll learn a few things, and have a few laughs along the way.  As I’ve finally learned, when we allow ourselves to be hurt by other people’s behavior, we only have ourselves to blame.  I offer tips for dragging yourself out of the gutter and approaching your pain from a different perspective.  We all are on our journey in learning to love ourselves.  Some of us just take the back roads.

Click on the link below if you’d like to order the book through the distributor.  If you’d like a personalized autographed copy, please write to me at  The books are $9.95 plus S&H.

Hope you enjoy!

Winks from Heaven

Mikey seems to be everywhere this month, turning lights on for me, messing with the phones, and I think he is as excited as we are that my daughter, Susie, and son-in-law, Vince, are expecting their first child.  It’s due on August 26th, the day before Mikey’s birthday.  It feels like heaven is returning us a little piece of Mikey, or at least a little person to celebrate.

I have felt Mikey’s presence around me many nights as I’ve stayed up working on a new book.  In fact, Mikey’s sense of humor seemed to push me off in another direction one night, and I sat aside the “serious” book I was working on and started frantically typing about a subject that has both amused and frustrated me:  the passive aggression on Facebook.  Both cell phones and internet chat are great for passive aggressive people, who never want to have a face-to-face conversation.  Mikey also hated that form of communication, which might seem unusual for someone classified as “autistic.”  But Mikey enjoyed people….he just preferred to experience them one at a time.  And he liked them in person, rather than on the phone.  Ironically, the last conversations he had with me, Susie, and his dad, Mike, were all on the phone.

The last year has been eventful with the publishing of Mikey’s book, Grandma Susie’s death, Susie’s marriage, my departure from the daily work-force, Mike’s remarriage, and the big baby news. I wonder how many of those things would have happened in 2012 if Mikey hadn’t died in 2008.  Did the stress of Mikey’s death take years or months off of Grandma Susie’s life?  Would Susie or Mike have gotten married sooner?  I know Mikey’s death threw us all into a tailspin.  I think I would still be messing around with the original book’s manuscript. I know if I had gotten it published, it would certainly be a different book.  I would still be living in Oklahoma with Mikey.  I can hardly imagine myself leaving a sizable regular paycheck, with a roof to provide over Mikey and me.  I don’t know what any of our lives would be like if Mikey was still with us, but I know God doesn’t let us go back and choose the way we would have written the script.  If we are all actors in a play, then we are often the puppets.  We move when God pulls the strings.

I’ve done a lot of traveling to promote the book and I’ve met a lot of interesting and wonderful people.  Mikey seems to inspire everyone who reads his story, and it makes my heart swell when people share their stories with me.  It’s like getting postcards from heaven when I open my email box and read stories inspired by Mikey.  So thank you, to all who have shared your stories with me!